the Dalaverse

I dropped by Five Guys for lunch, because the last time was three months ago and I've been intermittently craving it ever since. "Don't Stop Believing" was playing on the PA system as I took the first bite and it was kind of like the end of "Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle." They really are the best burgers ever. And the fries remind me of Thrashers in Ocean City, except I wish they'd introduce a smaller size because I have never finished even half of one regular bag.

I've also gotten back to the Trek novelization audiobook (have been distracted by fanmixes for the last week). The whole thing is pretty awesome (Pike is so badass you won't be able to stand it), but there are two expanded parts that struck me.


Delta Vega - first, I'd like to point out that a. Foster notes how Kirk's feelings are hurt when McCoy doesn't stick up for him, and b. McCoy does try to get Spock to keep him on the ship. I believe he says something along the lines of "I can keep him quiet." Which makes me want to write a fic in which Kirk is confined to McCoy's quarters and McCoy is like "Do I have to sedate you?" and Kirk is like "No let's make out instead," steals the hypospray in the moment of distraction and knocks McCoy out, escapes, is caught and THEN thrown off the ship.

So then Kirk wakes up on Hoth and proceeds to throw a hissy fit, for way longer than in the movie. There's lots of cursing and he is in fact in the middle of a genuine "MOTHERFUCKER" when the monster appears. And then, and then, Zach Quinto does this long yodeling roar that is HILARIOUS. Btw, am I the only one who thought they made Delta Vega an ice planet just because CGI looks good against a white background? Anyone? Bueller?

The mind meld scene goes pretty much the same, only it makes Nero make more sense. There are no steamy shared memories of Kirk/Spock Original Recipe, which is why fanfic is sometimes better than reality. Oh, and Quinto's Scotty accent is wonderfully bad (his Chekov voice sounds exactly like Bartok the bat from "Anastasia").

The other part is the K/S fight on the bridge. It's less "OH NOES Mommy and Daddy are fighting!" and more THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE. Get this: at the end of Kirk's spiel, Uhura stands up and goes "OMG DONTCHOO TALK ABOUT SPOCK'S MAMA U HOR" (she actually says "Stop it, you son of a bitch!" which makes me happy because they all talk like normal people without a PG13 rating) and McCoy totally stops her and says "Let 'em fight," which I choose to translate as "Chill, girl, we gotta let our boyfriends work this out."

After Spock bounces, they all demand to know what the hell Kirk is doing but he demurs, and then Sulu is like "BITCH I GOT A PHD IN BADASS, I CAN HANDLE YOUR TIME TRAVEL SHIT" and Chekov is like "RESPECT." It would drag the film down, but it's kind of awesome in text.

Also the joke between Kirk and his favorite roughneck is "moonbeam," which is so much less funny than "cupcake."

And also: GIP.