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the_dala at 10:37pm on 18/07/2003
the_dala at 10:37pm on 18/07/2003Ack, I can't find Blonde on Blonde; I hope I didn't lose it. It's probably just lying double in some other CD case, but still, after losing (yes, actually LOSING -- they are nowhere to be found) Ryan Adams and Rubber Soul, I am paranoid. Not paranoid enough to put my CDs where they belong, oh no, of course not.
Work today, etc. Tomorrow Darlene and I are starting our half-shifts for Saturdays, so I only have to work four hours. This is awesome. I took the early shift, which means I have to get up early, but I'm also done by one. And since our mailman is on vacation still and the sub mailman brings the mail all late, I probably will be gone before it gets there. Hee.
Tracee brought us some really yummy caramel popcorn. I like working with her, she's funny. Also, she doesn't pull the charts too far in advance like Ellen does. Today somebody actually complained about getting a courtesy call three days early (that's Ellen's gig, so it's her fault). It isn't that I don't like Ellen, she's just very...active. Except she doesn't actually do any work, she just delegates, and that can get annoying.
I'm really bummed that we're not going to Cedar Point tomorrow. Seriously hope that we will be going sometime before the end of the summer, because it would be so much fun -- Kings Dominion on Saturday will be fun too, but that's only one day. I want a six-hour drive! I want an adventure!
Was also looking forward to not working till Thursday ::pouts:: Though I really do need the money. I tell ya what though, if we don't go to Cedar Point, I AM going skydiving. And if I don't get to go this year, I AM going next summer.
Met Jessica's roommate today. She was little and blonde and gave off a conservative vibe, which should make her rooming with Jess interesting, to say the least. It's a weird thought. I can remember thinking in a vague sense that I would be living with Jessie and Stephanie when we went to college -- I didn't know where that would be, and I didn't have any idea what it would be like, but that's how it was supposed to be (and of course Jessie and I would be next-door neighbors at the nursing home, still fighting as always. It'd be kind of neat if that happens). I mean, it's different than leaving my other friends -- I've known Jessie since first grade, and consistently been friends with her every year since. Life without Jess is just too odd to contemplate. On the other hand, I used to think the same thing about life without Steph, and I've survived that. I dunno. Probably the H___s will always live where they live, and my parents will always live where they live, so Jessie and I will never be that far about.
Meh, I lurve my Spirit of Writing candle. I think it is my favorite New Orleans artifact. I got such a strong New Orleans jones the other day; I have no idea why I suddenly wanted to be there so badly, but I did.
Have been watching my BtVS DVDs, gaining a new sense of appreciation for S4. I haven't gotten to Riley and the Initiative yet, of course -- and Adam, second-crappiest villain ever (I still think they botched the execution of the inspired idea of the First), is still a long way off. What can I say, I love Scooby interaction, and the early episodes of S4 have plenty of that. Later plotlines may have been terribly sucky, but the dialogue was great, and S4 has some of the show's funniest episodes ("Something Blue," anyone? I never, ever get sick of blind!drunk!Giles -- "Stop doing that, you smell like fruit roll-ups") Plus it's fun to see Anya and remember when she was all new and exciting, not to mention brunette. How sad is it that I sort of fell for Parker's completely obvious sensitive-boy routine? And I'd forgotten that "The Harsh Light of Day" was the Bif Naked episode. Yay Biffy.
Is it terrible of me that I am glad that I won't be here for Daddy's operation? It seems terrible. But I'm not good with stuff like that, I learned that when he had the neck operation, which wasn't even particularly serious. I am so bottled-up, emotionwise, that it's kind of scary. I think that's why I often dream about things so sad I wake up crying -- I've dreamed once, recently, that Jessie died, twice that my dad died, and several times that he and Mom started smoking again. Which might not strike other people as particularly tragic, but...it's hard to explain. You try growing up with smoking parents and listening to the D.A.R.E. people give you all those statistics, call your mommy and daddy addicts, show you pictures of diseased lungs, have your teachers sniff at your coats because they stink like it. And then you tell me nightmares -- real, scary fucking nightmares -- about smoking are silly.
And just this week I dreamed about Silver. In the dream I was with her, so it wasn't sad, but that just made the sense of loss all the more acute when I woke up. When I think about that pony for more than a second, I can't breathe -- it's still that strong. My body misses riding, but my heart misses Silver.
Bleagh. That was maudlin AND badly written. My apologies.
The trailer for "Seabiscuit" makes me cry. I'm such a fucking wreck. I can't even discuss these things with an inanimate web journal.
And now my mother is angry with me because I refused to watch this program on Seabiscuit with her, and I can't explain that it's because I'll start sobbing.
Methinks it is once again time to read suicidal!Harry, which will never be finished or posted anywhere, I don't think.
It's a bad idea to go too long with listening to Dylan, you know.
Work today, etc. Tomorrow Darlene and I are starting our half-shifts for Saturdays, so I only have to work four hours. This is awesome. I took the early shift, which means I have to get up early, but I'm also done by one. And since our mailman is on vacation still and the sub mailman brings the mail all late, I probably will be gone before it gets there. Hee.
Tracee brought us some really yummy caramel popcorn. I like working with her, she's funny. Also, she doesn't pull the charts too far in advance like Ellen does. Today somebody actually complained about getting a courtesy call three days early (that's Ellen's gig, so it's her fault). It isn't that I don't like Ellen, she's just very...active. Except she doesn't actually do any work, she just delegates, and that can get annoying.
I'm really bummed that we're not going to Cedar Point tomorrow. Seriously hope that we will be going sometime before the end of the summer, because it would be so much fun -- Kings Dominion on Saturday will be fun too, but that's only one day. I want a six-hour drive! I want an adventure!
Was also looking forward to not working till Thursday ::pouts:: Though I really do need the money. I tell ya what though, if we don't go to Cedar Point, I AM going skydiving. And if I don't get to go this year, I AM going next summer.
Met Jessica's roommate today. She was little and blonde and gave off a conservative vibe, which should make her rooming with Jess interesting, to say the least. It's a weird thought. I can remember thinking in a vague sense that I would be living with Jessie and Stephanie when we went to college -- I didn't know where that would be, and I didn't have any idea what it would be like, but that's how it was supposed to be (and of course Jessie and I would be next-door neighbors at the nursing home, still fighting as always. It'd be kind of neat if that happens). I mean, it's different than leaving my other friends -- I've known Jessie since first grade, and consistently been friends with her every year since. Life without Jess is just too odd to contemplate. On the other hand, I used to think the same thing about life without Steph, and I've survived that. I dunno. Probably the H___s will always live where they live, and my parents will always live where they live, so Jessie and I will never be that far about.
Meh, I lurve my Spirit of Writing candle. I think it is my favorite New Orleans artifact. I got such a strong New Orleans jones the other day; I have no idea why I suddenly wanted to be there so badly, but I did.
Have been watching my BtVS DVDs, gaining a new sense of appreciation for S4. I haven't gotten to Riley and the Initiative yet, of course -- and Adam, second-crappiest villain ever (I still think they botched the execution of the inspired idea of the First), is still a long way off. What can I say, I love Scooby interaction, and the early episodes of S4 have plenty of that. Later plotlines may have been terribly sucky, but the dialogue was great, and S4 has some of the show's funniest episodes ("Something Blue," anyone? I never, ever get sick of blind!drunk!Giles -- "Stop doing that, you smell like fruit roll-ups") Plus it's fun to see Anya and remember when she was all new and exciting, not to mention brunette. How sad is it that I sort of fell for Parker's completely obvious sensitive-boy routine? And I'd forgotten that "The Harsh Light of Day" was the Bif Naked episode. Yay Biffy.
Is it terrible of me that I am glad that I won't be here for Daddy's operation? It seems terrible. But I'm not good with stuff like that, I learned that when he had the neck operation, which wasn't even particularly serious. I am so bottled-up, emotionwise, that it's kind of scary. I think that's why I often dream about things so sad I wake up crying -- I've dreamed once, recently, that Jessie died, twice that my dad died, and several times that he and Mom started smoking again. Which might not strike other people as particularly tragic, but...it's hard to explain. You try growing up with smoking parents and listening to the D.A.R.E. people give you all those statistics, call your mommy and daddy addicts, show you pictures of diseased lungs, have your teachers sniff at your coats because they stink like it. And then you tell me nightmares -- real, scary fucking nightmares -- about smoking are silly.
And just this week I dreamed about Silver. In the dream I was with her, so it wasn't sad, but that just made the sense of loss all the more acute when I woke up. When I think about that pony for more than a second, I can't breathe -- it's still that strong. My body misses riding, but my heart misses Silver.
Bleagh. That was maudlin AND badly written. My apologies.
The trailer for "Seabiscuit" makes me cry. I'm such a fucking wreck. I can't even discuss these things with an inanimate web journal.
And now my mother is angry with me because I refused to watch this program on Seabiscuit with her, and I can't explain that it's because I'll start sobbing.
Methinks it is once again time to read suicidal!Harry, which will never be finished or posted anywhere, I don't think.
It's a bad idea to go too long with listening to Dylan, you know.
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