the Dalaverse

Gacked from shrieking_ell - I couldn't help myself, I kept hitting refresh!

My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Harry accidentally destroys all of Scotland in the Chamber of Secrets Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom

I got nothin'. Just...heeeee.

My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Hermione Granger becomes Prime Minister in the library, with the revolver Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom

Because who doesn't love some Clue and world takeover?

A few more winners behind the cut.

My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Hermione Granger gets pregnant by Dobby the House Elf using a Befuddlement Draught Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom

That is so disturbing and yet...more canon-adjacent than most of the ones I got. I'm sure people have written house-elves as sexual beings somewhere.

My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Voldemort discovers Jesus and becomes a Bishop without a second glance Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom

Not even the Dark Lord can hide from Jesus!

My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Lucius Malfoy is arrested for selling Ritalin to the younger pupils in a scene written in the style of Samuel Beckett Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom

Back to Azkaban with you, hot white-haired Jason Isaacs Lucius! Although it's the second part that really makes this one shine.

My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Remus Lupin is killed by Nymphadora Tonks using Avada Kedavra Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom

Worst. Honeymoon. Ever.