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I'm still keeping the peace. I am holding onto it TIGHT dammit.
So I was watching the "Choose or Lose" special on Kerry (who is slowly becoming less creepy to me even if I'm still going to resent having to vote for him) and Vanessa is sitting at her computer, very often looking over at the TV. I say absolutely nothing, barring a comment about the snazzy pink (red?) and green stripes on the press plane and the wacky hot pink (red?) polka-dotted tie Kerry was wearing. And we get to the gay marriage segment of the program, which we all knew was coming, and Gideon Yago (still have a giant crush on him, btw) asks Kerry if he believes that people are born gay or that it's a choice. Kerry says he believes it's how we are born, as I knew he would, and Ness says, "I do not agree with that." And then she says it again. And I had to bite my tongue against the first ten things that leapt into my head, the most diplomatic of which would have been "That's why you're not voting for him, and I am."
I really just don't want to deal with the headache brought on by political and religious debate. It's not worth the effort, as neither of us is going to budge (I keep arguing with my mother, who claims that Vanessa's been incredibly sheltered her entire life, that there's a certain point where that stops being a factor. I feel that Vanessa has made up her mind as thoroughly as I have, and I would be a total hypocrite if I tried to put it all on the way she's been brought up). We have to live together. The peace is really important.
On the other hand, it's frustrating to not be able to make the sort of connection you can make with people when you're totally open about your opinions. I'm not going to sit here and lie by any means -- jeebus, I've sat there in front of her father and her closest family friend after they said grace and answered the question as to what religion I am ("Are you a Christian girl?" as Mr. Chris put it) perfectly calmly (the answer happened to be no). And if Vanessa comes out and asks me how I feel about gay rights, I'll say what I think and what I feel. I'm just not going to put myself up on a platform to do it, even when she's sort of-kind of trying to provoke, which I think she might have been doing tonight. She doesn't preach at me, and I have to respect that by not preaching at her.
Okay, now I'm just rambling.
So I was watching the "Choose or Lose" special on Kerry (who is slowly becoming less creepy to me even if I'm still going to resent having to vote for him) and Vanessa is sitting at her computer, very often looking over at the TV. I say absolutely nothing, barring a comment about the snazzy pink (red?) and green stripes on the press plane and the wacky hot pink (red?) polka-dotted tie Kerry was wearing. And we get to the gay marriage segment of the program, which we all knew was coming, and Gideon Yago (still have a giant crush on him, btw) asks Kerry if he believes that people are born gay or that it's a choice. Kerry says he believes it's how we are born, as I knew he would, and Ness says, "I do not agree with that." And then she says it again. And I had to bite my tongue against the first ten things that leapt into my head, the most diplomatic of which would have been "That's why you're not voting for him, and I am."
I really just don't want to deal with the headache brought on by political and religious debate. It's not worth the effort, as neither of us is going to budge (I keep arguing with my mother, who claims that Vanessa's been incredibly sheltered her entire life, that there's a certain point where that stops being a factor. I feel that Vanessa has made up her mind as thoroughly as I have, and I would be a total hypocrite if I tried to put it all on the way she's been brought up). We have to live together. The peace is really important.
On the other hand, it's frustrating to not be able to make the sort of connection you can make with people when you're totally open about your opinions. I'm not going to sit here and lie by any means -- jeebus, I've sat there in front of her father and her closest family friend after they said grace and answered the question as to what religion I am ("Are you a Christian girl?" as Mr. Chris put it) perfectly calmly (the answer happened to be no). And if Vanessa comes out and asks me how I feel about gay rights, I'll say what I think and what I feel. I'm just not going to put myself up on a platform to do it, even when she's sort of-kind of trying to provoke, which I think she might have been doing tonight. She doesn't preach at me, and I have to respect that by not preaching at her.
Okay, now I'm just rambling.
contemplative